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Meanwhile, the lists of users who have looked at each of your Story cards mean that you now have data — rudimentary and inconclusive, but still, data!— on who exactly is obsessing over you today, tomorrow and yesterday.“The theory is that whoever are your biggest stalkers on Instagram are at the top,” Ms.

When men meet him IRL, they are surprised to find that his real-life personality is not as exaggerated as his Instagram persona.

“It’s a two-dimensional platform, which inherently means we can’t see everything.

It would be really unhealthy to show all of ourselves on social media.”Adjust your expectations accordingly.

Unfortunately, Instagram is not all romance and daisies.

Last April, Roberto Forgione noticed that someone who had ghosted him was looking at his Instagram Stories — the brief, casual updates that hang around for 24 hours at the top of the app’s screen and include lists of the people who have seen them.“After a couple, I was like, ‘He’s back,’” Mr. He decided to take a chance and reach out in his direct messages.

“I asked him if he wanted to hang out, and he said yes,” Mr. The two have continued seeing each other since, spending Thanksgiving together and attending a wedding as each other’s dates.“I delete them [from my main account] to make a statement: ‘I don’t want to keep up with your life anymore,’” Mr. “Seeing the new life in pictures helps bring a certain closure,” Mr. “Then I know I’m totally fine with the relationship ending and I think it ends with another layer of healthiness to it.It’s really turning the page for both people.”Other social media platforms have had similar effects, but Instagram is massive (just Stories has nearly twice as many users as Snapchat does), and other pervasive platforms, such as Facebook, are not as dominated by daily, visual updates.“One ‘like’ could be, ‘I randomly liked your stuff’” Mr. “Two is, ‘I like two of your photos.’ Three is, ‘I’m intentionally trying to get your attention.’ It’s the equivalent of eyeing someone in a bar.”“Commenting would be equivalent to walking up to someone and saying a very basic hello,” Mr. “The DMing is the official, ‘I’m here and I’m not playing around.’” Ms.Fisher agreed: “Once they’re in your DMs and they’re commenting on things, that’s when they’re trying to make a move.” As in real life, reciprocation is important.Attend to their profile page, where you can see all their photos, as well.