Ever find yourself missing a guy—I mean strongly noticing his absence and wishing he was there—after only a few dates? Travel time When you fall for someone, you instantly want to vacation with them.That’s what new love birds want—to go away, cuddle and have sex all day in between meals, sleep, and maybe a few meals out of the hotel room.
We fear that we’ll feel like a fool for making ourselves so vulnerable if things don’t work out. You were taking a shot on something that could have been special.It’s rare two people meet who feel so instantly linked—you deserve a gold star for being brave and seeing where that went. But if it does, it was going to happen if you waited 6 months to sleep together as well. Because humans are why people often lose interest in each other after sex, but hey—better to know if that is the case now than longer down the line! But I would avoid ridiculous rules like “no sex for 90 days” or until date #20.Even worse, this myth is constantly perpetuated on dating forums, traditional dating advice columns, Hollywood movies, and by many so called dating experts.But as hard as it is to believe, moving slowly is always very bad dating strategy for men. To help you understand why taking it slow is such a bad strategy for dating (as a man), you need to understand why women (say they) want to "take it slow".The reason women want to take it slow is because the vast majority of women get attached after sex.
This is a evolutionary programmed response from women; it is, for the most part, out of their control.
Time leads to uncertainty, and uncertainty is almost never in your favor.
The longer you wait to escalate, the more likely something like this can happen: TVJ wrote a two part series on why you shouldn’t play the long game, which echoes a lot of what I said here. In those cases, "taking it slow" may be your best choice, because your alternative is not taking it anywhere.
Their logic on the last part is that if a guy is interested in more than just sex, he will put in more time and effort to "prove" he isn’t just looking for a quick lay (if he was, he would just give up after a date or two).
Now herein lies the rub: if you like her, especially if you like her, you want her to become attached to you.
The sooner you do it, the less likely another man will do it before you, and the more likely she will become attached to you and not someone else!