I'm personally only interested in gals that are happy with themselves and their accomplishments and don't need me to augment that. They spend some of the extra non-career time at the gym/ Sephora.
As long as it's clear they're not already married to their career, it feels a lot healthier too. Often, women who are 8-9-10s have found that they can get what they want/need without career or academic accomplishments. Many women with their own successful happy careers spent a little less time at the gym/blow out bar.
It's just a breeding ground for terrible dating habits/expectations. But New Portland is a confusing mess of insecurities. The reality is there is no one 'shining knight' or 'princess' for you.
You end up being comfortable being alone and that's more dangerous than anything I know. After years of dead-end jobs and miserable serial monogamy I've built a career and have been single for the longest period in my adult life. I suspect the alimony bit was a joke, but the timing on it wasn't so good.
I've actually gotten used to being alone and although it can be really painful, for the most part I'm actually way happier. Man someone just took the time to create a throwaway just to PM me something harassing because of my comments on this thread.
And, they aren't so easy to date, because they have their own schedules and plans.
Often what we say we want and what we act like we want aren't the same thing. I've spent a lot of time trying to date in portland. Then we had the big wave of "newbies" and an overall change in atmosphere, and I've struggled ever since!
I have a professional job and work a lot to remain successful at it so it leaves me with little free time to find other like-minded professionals. I read his post quickly, saw your post, and was really confused.
When I do have time I try to get out of the city and detox my mind in the mountains or the ocean and the last thing I want to do is bring someone else along I barely know. Their style sure wasn't my style, but I didn't care so much. There are so many posers, flakes, try-hards, loose people, non-committal kooks, people with zero self respect, plenty with no future and no ambition. Where are people who take care of themselves and have some sort of interest in a future? If the first thing out of their mouth is "What do I do? " Let me translate that for you: Translation #1 - I'm a wantrepreneur. Usually, I have terrible ideas and just go from one failed one to the next while the trust fund/parents money lasts to keep me happy.This cracks me up, I haven't run into too many real entrepreneurs but much of what you say is dead on. And the "consultants" and "story tellers" and don't forget the "life coaches" O M F G the "life coaches" what the fuck is up with them how full of yourself do you have to be to think you're going to coach life. Or the gals that travel with it that have a brand of 'woo-woo crystal energy' vibe to them that makes me run screaming to the hills.They just can't fathom how I get through my week without smoking, and tend to think I must be judging them for smoking...despite explicitly saying I don't care if they smoke or not. I can usually get them to go out somewhere on the first date, but after that, they just want to "netflix and chill". There are a lot of dudes who know how to sound good until at least the first date. Truly most seemed to think the word "relationship " was like "abracadabra "; speak the magic word and all their wishes would be granted with no other work or responsibility from them. It's like shopping at a store with 10,000 different kinds of catsup.I did the online dating thing, and any time I found genuine interest in a woman, I'd always take them on at LEAST 3-4 dates before we started hanging out in private. There are so many options that it's easy to get confused about what you want, make arbitrary choices that aren't really important, and choosing one involves saying no to all the other great ones.Part of dating is learning how your partner will react when their food is prepared wrong, or someone cuts in line or whatever. So for me, part of dating is this person may one day be in his life and I don't want to be learning their quirks after its too late and my son is now exposed to that. If you have relationship skills, you can make a great, lifelong relationship work with a good number of people. There are probably hundreds of things to do out there in PDX with a large following of people in the exact same work-boat as you are. If you just want to get laid, download Pure, or learn how to find the rare CL ad written by somebody who's not scary, or whatever.