The point of the Nuclear Option isn’t about screaming “you broke my heart trying to pretend that it doesn’t is just deluding yourself.
In fact, most of the time, you’ve both been laying the groundwork for the breakup for a long time, sometimes even right from the beginning.Being able to have any sort of successful relationship with your ex means that you need to have processed your breakup and taken ownership of your part in it…In fact, it’s possible that your ex could be an incredible friend.Provided you know how to deal with her after the relationship ends. Because, as you'll see, there's something she desperately wants — something that only YOU can give her. Yeah, she can move on and find someone else, but a part of her soul and a part of her heart will be left behind. Once you do, she can drop all her defenses and come running back to you.
Believe it or not, none of those things have anything to do with whether you can get your girlfriend back. Now, this might sting a bit but you're the only one who can heal the hurt because you're the one that caused it. She just needs you to show her that it can actually work.
By dwelling on your ex, you’ve locked the quantum state of your relationship. The next key to a drama-free relationship with your ex – whether you become close friends or are just able to not flee the room when you see her – is to honestly assess what led to the end of the relationship.
Breakups are rarely one-sided affairs;even when it’s because someone cheated or something as simple as somebody’s feelings had changed, it’s almost never a “U R DUMPED BECAUSE FUCK YOU” situation.
Which means that there are going to be all those awkward “accidental” encounters at the places you used to frequent together, the painful “oh shit, who is she talking to?
” moments at parties and other occasions when your ex seemingly conspires with the universe to remind you of her existence. But just because the two of you broke up doesn’t automatically mean that everything is going to be awkward and painful between the two of you forever.
Is it possible that she may still be desperate for you to "win her back," even though she swears she's done? You might think you've got no chance, but that's because you don't know how to get your ex back. She doesn't want the last however-long-you-were-dating to feel like a waste.