The thing about anger is that it uses up a lot of energy and space in your separated man’s brain and heart.
It is a process that requires time, self-awareness and hard work.
And there’s a strong chance your separated man has a long way to go.
More often than not, it’s anger, self-pity, and feelings of entitlement that fuel a man’s complaints over support. So if you decide to stick around, I’d recommend you prepare for more than a nose full.
He might feel he deserves more of a say, more over how she spends the money, among other things. If he was the perpetrator: Though some experts say, “Once a cheater, always a cheater”, I personally think that some people can learn from past mistakes.
Whatever the case may be, these kinds of circumstances are extremely stressful for him, which will inevitably ripple into your relationship together in some way(s).
Another reason he doesn’t regularly see his kids could be because right now, he despises his ex, himself and the divorce situation, more than he loves his kids.
I also hasten to add that not separated man is disastrous to date – and should be considered as a unique individual.
My concern, however, is that women are blindly and/or naively getting involved with separated men without understanding the huge risk: that is, . If your separated man consistently avoids talking about his divorce or says things to minimize or downplay it, consider it a warning sign worth flagging.
If you chose to proceed in dating him, I caution you to proceed slowly and with eyes wide open. Comments like, “Bah, I just want it over,” or “Doesn’t matter, we’ve been strangers for years,” may seem casual, even confident — but they also mask what’s going on underneath and behind the scenes.
When a man has truly processed his divorce and moved on, he should be able to speak to it with compassion, kindness, and wisdom.
For the number of men who claim to be destitute and “victims of an unfair legal system”, you’d think there’d be a line-up of trucks parked by the Bow River with separated dads living out of them.